What’s that outside my window? It’s like a glowy orb in the sky and it burns my eyes when I look at it. Also, it’s like someone flicked on the light switch for the entire country, and there is a scorching, oppressive heat that appears to be coming from out of space to make my skin turn red and raw, and to make even the most basic of manual tasks unbearably uncomfortable. They call it summer, I am told. Two things should now be apparent. Convention season is in full swing, and the writer of this article is a fair-skinned ginger.
RomCon in the making
Over my many years I have watched my beard fill out, my hair thin out, and my belly round out, but one thing has never changed - I thoroughly enjoy a nerdy convention. Nothing quite beats a large gaggle of geeks coming together to admire each other's cosplays, newly acquired loot, and general dedications to our niche, or not so niche anymore, fandoms. Cons are an opportunity to be amongst your tribe in a safe space, meet like-minded folk, and get your hands on the latest and coolest merch.
I lean more on the wargaming side of the hobby these days, but with decades of boardgaming, roleplaying, and a bit of card gaming under my belt too I’ve been to my fair share of nerdy meet ups. My current con of choice is Salute - one of the largest wargaming conventions in the world. Unfortunately, due to personal circumstances, I was unable to attend this year. To keep things positive, I wanted to channel my excitement and experience of making the most out of conventions into some handy tips that might make you feel more confident in attending your first get together. Here are the hot tips from an old man doing his best to support and encourage the love of the hobby in others.
Quick aside, analogue gaming and other geek-focused conventions tend to attract a higher proportion of neurodivergent people, particularly those on the autism spectrum - AKA, kids with the ‘tism, as well as many with ADHD and other related conditions. Something about the structured rules, familiar routines, and the sheer range of special interests on offer (train games, anyone?) make analogue gaming a welcoming and comfortable space, and provide a nice supplement, catalyst, or even diversion from social settings. With so many neurodivergent people embedded in and/or leading these communities we now have some truly inclusive spaces and I would see that continue and multiply tenfold.
As someone with SLAYDHD myself, I’ll be writing through the lens of my personal experiences in the hopes of providing some gentle encouragement and instill a little confidence in first time attendees who might have a similar perspective on the world as me. That said, I don’t write on behalf of the entire spectrum so let’s keep space for plenty of other thoughts, tips, and perspectives.
Tickets, trains, and automobiles - preparing ahead of the event
Tickets - don’t put energy into an event until you know you are getting in. Best to get tickets early before they can sell out and to get in on those early bird prices. Always buy through the vendor directly, or their officially licensed ticket vendor, and avoid 3rd party platforms with deals that seem too good to be true because they probably are. When you have your ticket make sure to print it or at least download it on your phone. Signal and WIFI at cons can be inconsistent so don’t rely on trying to connect to show your ticket at the door.
You are going on a journey
Might I humbly suggest you preplan your journey. How are you getting there? If using public transport can you prebook and pay for your travel? I like to pay in advance because it’s one less thing to stress about on the day. Again, print your tickets, along with any directions/instructions/maps if that will help you. I like to keep event and travel tickets in a (rain proof) plastic wallet in my bag in case disaster strikes but that may not be an issue if you like in a country with a less erratic weather system.
Co-ordinating your collaborators
I have coned with a wide array of people over the years. All are good folks, but some are more work than others. For my sins, I am sometimes “The Organiser” charged with getting people to and from events in one piece and all the other bits and pieces that need to happen. I’m sorry if you are an organiser - Gods help you - here is the best advice I can give you if you are in a similar spot:
- Communicate (or follow up) in text on a shared platform - WhatsApp group, Discord server, etc. to create a reference for plans and intentions. I like to get all the key details written up in one concise message to outline times, travel arrangements, attendees, and any other essential info, and I’ll update/edit the message with key developments such as who still needs to pay, confirmation the tickets have been bought, and so on.
- If buying tickets together then do so after your friends have paid you, not before. It’s rarely malicious but it’s easy for people to forget they haven't paid so it’s OK to follow up politely. I also don’t like to be a single point of failure so I make sure to forward everyone their tickets before the event even if the expectation is that I will bring them.
- If your group is cosplaying or gaming on the day then it’s worth doing some regular check-ins to remind and motivate people towards whatever needs doing. For wargaming, I like to drop in some progress pics of my half finished minis and ask how other people’s paint jobs are coming along. Make sure you have a clear picture of who has achieved what a week or so prior to the event. If people look like they won’t be ready in time then it’s better to know that in advance rather than finding out on the train that you will be the only one of your group in cosplay because Brian assumed you were making his costume, Emma’s LED’s didn't arrive in time, and Oz ran out of hot glue.
- Anticipate the flaky (non comital) people. After years of managing friends who are more of a vibe than actual people, I have developed an approach that seems fair. Essentially, give plenty of notice when you require action and be prepared to nudge them. Communicate your deadlines, why the deadlines are important, and what happens if they are missed. You don’t need to be draconian about it. A friendly “Hi guys, I’m going to buy the tickets on Friday 13th to ensure we get that early bird pricing. If you want in then ping me the cash before 17:00 that Friday. If I don’t hear from you by then I will assume you are not interested or doing your own thing. Shout if y’all have questions.” I used to feel harsh setting deadlines but I realised the lack of confirmed numbers and final plans was causing its own stresses and challenges. Tailor your personal approach as needed but just understand you can only carry people so far.
What to wear, civilian mode
Cons can get really, really hot. Hundreds or thousands of people bouncing round a hall all day generates a lot of heat. If you take one thing from this article make it this: wear layers you can easily adjust. Be prepared to tie your hoody round your waist, or pop your light coat in your bag or else you're gonna get sweaty and need to drink thrice as much… which leads to peeing four times as much. Remember, you are there for the merchant stalls, not the toilet stalls.
Also, footwear footwear footwear. You are going to clock those miles so look after those toes, my dude. Think cushioning and fear the blisters. Good shoes; Hiking boots, police/army boots, squishy sports trainers. Bad shoes; plimsolls, new Dr. Martens, stiletto heels, clogs, etc.
Also also, it’s very very hard not to spend money at a con. More on that later. That in mind, think storage. A backpack or record bag, maybe cargo trousers/shorts with big pockets, perhaps a couple tote bags scrunched up in your main bag as emergency extras if you accidentally buy 9 more boardgames than intended. That’s okay by the way - safe space.
Lastly, and this is very much a my group sort of thing, but we try to wear something distinctive on our upper bodies. A friend of mine always wears the Jayne hat which is easy to spot from afar… partly as he’s 6ft4. I opt for a lairy shirt as my head is orange enough, and my partner usually has freshly dyed neon hair. All of these things help us locate each other in a crowd if we need to. Also picking a new daft shirt for each con is good fun. If you plan on sticking as a group or going solo then this is less important, but still fun…
Cosplay cheats
See above, but also, consider this question. How robust is your cosplay? I have a cosplay pal who never goes anywhere in costume without a needle, thread, superglue and when relevant, a (very small) hot glue gun. Bonus points if you can store them within character accessories - bat belt, anyone? Be prepared for seams and superglue to fail and make sure you have a backup outfit underneath, or the tools to make field repairs.
Also, if you are cosplaying as agent 47 then you’ve got it easy but for those with bat wings, spikey tails, and mega gun swords, you might want to give extra considerations around travel. Public transport is decidedly less enjoyable when there are no seats and you have to awkwardly stand in the aisle in full Lord of the Rings Grom cosplay. Some events offer changing facilities and/or lockers which might suit your needs better.
Lastly, and this is grim but I’m going to say it because it might save your life. You might think your cosplay isn’t hot after trying it on in your living room but multiply that by a thousand in a hall of heated nerds. Think about ventilation, cooling, and…. I’m so sorry…. drainage … before it’s too late. Truth before the heavens I know someone who wore latex at a big con once and had to [You really don’t want to know this so I removed it].
Cosplay with confidence.
May or may not be relevant to you. We all have our own levels of confidence. Some are raging embers born to flare as the burning heart of any social event they attend. Others, like me, are little worm-people who shun the gaze of strangers and will attempt to belly crawl their way out of any social situation they find themselves in. That said, cosplay is like armour. It’s simultaneously an escape and a power up - It keeps you safe, and allows you to be something else entirely. For some this is a comfort, adrenaline rush, and confidence boost. Just remember if you are the sort to get in to character that we still need to be treating each other with respect and kindness… I see you, Deadpoolers.
Watch the wallet
Of course, disposable income will vary from one to another. Unless you just won the lotto, I suggest thinking about the budget way in advance. I like to put aside a little money each payday in the months leading up to the event. Consider what you are hoping to buy and set your savings target accordingly, but stay open to surprises. You will almost certainly walk past something that makes you do that oooooh noise. It will call to you. You will need it. For me it’s usually minis with a “just a dumb little guy” vibe. Make sure to have a little extra in reserve so you can treat yourself. Self care. This should be pretty obvious in 2026 but most vendors will be expecting card payments so make that your first approach. Word to the wise, if you usually pay by tapping your phone then remember that the bigger convention halls often struggle for phone signals. Don’t be like me, staring awkwardly into the eyes of an apologetic vendor as we both hang at the mercy of the little buffering circle for what feels like the passing of the last age of man. Make it easy on everyone and bring a card. Cash also exists but not all vendors may be able to take it. That’s fair though because I realise as I write this I have forgotten how to use physical currency myself. It has numbers and you have to do maths in your hand before a stranger then checks your maths in their hand, or something? These are the heavy little circles that taste bad, right?
Food/water
It gonna be expensive, yo. I’ve done some events that had really good food stalls inside or nearby which made for a lovely, if pricey treat. I’ve also been to a convention where I queued for 30 minutes to pay £9 for a bottle of Fanta and my generation's most disappointing hot dog. Live your own life, but I like to take a pack lunch and save myself the disappointment. I’m also happy to pivot and have my sandwich for dins instead if I encounter some irresistible munch. Either way, you can’t go wrong with a flask or bottle of water. Pack as much as you expect to drink (remember cons get spicey), then double it. Hydrate, homie.
Nerdy noises and the sensory boss battle If you are sensitive to noise then you probably thought of this somewhere around the first paragraph, but yeah big room filled with scores of nerds squeeing at everything they see - mucho loud. It is commonplace to see peeps with noise canceling headphones at cons these days. Likewise, if you just want something to take the edge off then some discreet earplugs will do the trick. Just remember to take them out when trying to hear the merchants. Khajiit has wares only if you can hear what khajiit is trying to say to you. Even without headphones, you can usually step out for a quiet reset and fresh air. Just make sure you can get back in which sometimes means getting your hand stamped or having your ticket ready again.
Likewise, if you have sensitivity around touch or mobility challenges then be aware that sometimes cons can get a little up in your face. Certain stalls, especially those advertising limited editions/stock can feel like a WWE mass brawl event except hairier, and with more backpacks. If you are the sort that needs or prefers a healthy boundary of personal space or just doesn’t want to get caught in a crush then consider greasing yourself with animal fat or open carrying a flail. Perhaps more sensibly, avoid the early rush as the eager beavers tend to calm down by around midday. If you are after something which you expect might sell quickly then contact the seller and ask to prepay so they can hold one for you to collect later in the day.
Lastly, I would hope that most larger events will be clearly demonstrating their commitments to accessibility via their website and socials but do reach out if you have specific concerns. Smaller, more local events do sometimes overlook these aspects so you might want to consider checking in to make sure the venue has the facilities you need - ramps, lifts, baby change facilities, etc. If you find an event that doesn't have what you need to get involved, and you have the mental energy to, this makes for great feedback to the event organisers which they can hopefully implement ahead of the event, or at least influence their decision when selecting a venue for next year. Absolutely feedback after you have a poor accessibility experience too. I know it’s a pain, but help yourself be seen and fight the good fight if you can. X
Reading the rules manual
Remember, we’re all friends here. To do right by each other let’s talk about etiquette.
- Ask politely before taking a photo of someone. Don’t push your phone in people’s faces, and don’t touch people, their costumes, or their props without being invited to. Remember, cosplay is not consent.
- Respect other people's personal space. That goes for the above, but also be mindful of others in queues and when pushing through crowds. It’s better to say “excuse me” than to excuse yourself with a shoulder barge or drop kick.
- Remember that most of the staff are volunteers. They are giving up their day so you can enjoy yours. You might be stressed, hot, hangry, exhausted and experiencing all sorts of overload but they might be too. Be respectful, be kind.
- Deodorant. I cannot stress to you, yet again, how hot cons are. Everyone is going to sweat so this is a public service announcement - Make sure you are freshly showered and plaster those pits with anti-stank. Yes, especially you, you beast.
- Don’t spoil. When enthusing on your favourite [media thing], don’t deny others the joy of that big reveal or sneaky betrayal.
- Don’t Gatekeep. Inclusion, remember. You don’t need to have seen every episode, played every game, or have bought every expansion to be a fan of something. Raise that portcullis and make space for people to enjoy what they enjoy.
- Be kind, be patient, be mindful. Remember, lots of spectrum kids about. That means a lot of people will be stressing about personal space, conversations, people, noise, etc. etc..
- Stalls are not museums. Be mindful to handle merchandise with respect and care. Keep your sweaty hands off the hand drawn illustrations and don’t drop those hand crafted dragon eggs on the hardwood floor.
Social stuff
There are many valid ways to enjoy your con. If you are someone who struggles with social battery, or just the social, then plan your energy. What time of day do you have your best buzz? If you are expecting to peak zoomies around midday then maybe that’s when you hit the stalls and haggle the merchants, or get your buds round a table for some games. Dip down around mid afternoon? That’s when you want to sit in on some talks, or get some headphones on and browse the shops in your own time and headspace.
Also, don’t feel pressured by comparison with others. I have a pal who warp speeds through the stalls, chats up all the game designers, gets free copies and minis a plenty, and demo’s 6 games you have never heard of by midday. He impresses me greatly but I am not he. I like a slower day with a few flexible goals I can strive for in my own time. If I tried to play keepy up with my hyperpal then I would be stressing most of the day rather than enjoying it. If your perfect convention is playing a 4 hour game with your buddies of old before buying some stickers and a hotdog on the way out then my guy, you are right where destiny put you.
For others the draw of a con is getting together with strangers to experience new things, or perhaps you are building up to stepping out of your comfort zone. Board games are social by nature and their structure can really help engage in an otherwise stressful environment. For an easier time with new players look for games that are co-op or with shared goals, turn based, offer clear topics of conversation, and defined interactions. You do not have to carry the entire social experience yourself. In fact, many neurodivergent gamers find that games are one of the easiest ways to connect with new people because the activity itself acts as a framework for interaction. If you have a particular game in mind then consider bringing it, and maybe even a little sign to post at the end of your table explaining the game and the experience you are looking for? Or perhaps survey for interest on relevant online communities before heading out to avoid any disappointment.
Lastly, you are authorised to bounce off from time to time and to protect your own fun. You can politely make excuses to get out of the “quick demo” that’s no longer quick or holding your interest, and it’s a healthy decision to take an hour’s time out because you are overwhelmed and need to reboot outside with a nommy drink and some quiet reflection on your purchase hoard thus far. Consider your tools for sustainable engagement, carry your comfort items, prep your scripted convos, and permit yourself to engage in your way, because it’s your convention too.
Your convention experience doesn't have to be conventional
I am not here to tell you how to convention, because there is no single “correct” way to do it. My hope is simply that I have highlighted some common friction points neurodivergent gamers can run into and offered a few ideas that might make conventions feel more manageable and enjoyable. It is completely normal to feel nervous before your first event (I certainly was) but over time I found my groove, stopped trying to keep up with everyone else, and learned how to make the absolute most of each convention I attend.
The most important thing I have learned is that your convention experience does not have to look “normal” to be meaningful. You are allowed to change plans, take breaks, skip events, leave games early, avoid busy halls, or spend most of the weekend quietly playing a handful of games with people you feel comfortable around. None of that makes you bad at conventions, nor does it mean you have missed out if you didn’t tick every item on your itinerary. In fact, understanding your own limits and preferences is often the key to actually enjoying events rather than simply enduring them.
Conventions are a celebration of plasma rifles, dragon riders, goblins, aliens, ancient tentacle-bearded snoozy bois, and all things geek. They are a day of community and joy in a world that feels a bit much right now. To me, they are an opportunity to feel safe, connected, validated, and broke. I sincerely hope I have encouraged you to give a convention a go, and you might even see me there too - I will be in the queue for the cheesiest snack, and I shall be holding a place in line for you.
About the author:
Hasvik is as Hasvik does. Hasvik enjoys wargaming, TTRPGs, and board games, as well as Jaffa Cakes, frogs, and rolling my dice on the floor to intimidate my opponent. Hasvik has no socials and cannot be followed for he travels only the hidden paths.
